For those who read me regularly, you are aware that I’ve been fascinated with the area of Positive Psychology. I recently completed another psychology class via Coursera – the fourth in a series; this one on Resilience (link here). Resilience in this course was defined as the ability to bounce back from negative emotional experiences/adversity & flexible adaptation (growth) to changing demands of stressful/challenging situations. Like all the courses in this Coursera Positive Psychology sequence, the focus on practices and developing skills to be more positive is something I appreciate.
In my last blog (I Hear Voices) I talked about Thinking Traps of the inner voice and skills to quiet them. This blog post captures a couple of the other insights into this space of Putting Positive Psychology into Practice.
“What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself.” Abraham Maslow
This course had a great summation of all the aspects of awareness:
- Notice your thoughts – become aware of your inner voices and your deeply rooted self-limiting beliefs. (discussed here – I Hear Voices – and also here in Cultivating a Positive Mindset – link to guest post)
- Know your emotions – have a broad lexicon! (discussed in this Blog Link)
- Understand your “natural reactions” – what are your habitual responses and are they harmful (or helpful). This was also discussed in the I Hear Voices blog referenced above – your Thinking Traps.
- Know how to manage your physiology (stress management, deep breathing, mindfulness, meditation).
- Know your Signature Strengths and leverage them. (Blog Link)
I appreciate this summation of being self-aware…the first step of personal change.
Become a Joy Multiplier
The course also shared a significant tool to strengthen relationships. Supportive relationships (good connections with others) is a critical element of happiness, well-being, and longevity. Taking a slightly different approach to talking about active listening, the focus here is on understanding your Communication Response Style when someone shares something good with you (something they enjoyed, are proud of, or are excited about) – the quick conversation of “let me share this good news” you might have with a friend, a spouse, a child, a student. Only ONE of these response styles builds a relationship! (hint – Joy Multiplier)
- Joy Multiplier – authentically engage, shine the light on their positive experience, mirror the excitement, ask for more details, “that’s great, tell me more”
- Conversation Killer – distracted response, lack of attention/no eye contact, too tired, uninterested, “that’s good”, “uh-huh”, “yes dear”, “whatever”
- Conversation Hijacker – shifting conversation away from their situation, one-upmanship, “by the way, that reminds me….”
- Joy Thief – point out all the potential negatives/what’s wrong/downsides, raise concerns, “have you thought about….”.
This was mind opening. How many times do I have a distracted response? Shift the conversation to something else? Point out what could go wrong with the new idea? Whew.
What about you? Are you a regular Joy Multiplier?
From this recent course the skills/practices I’m focusing on this month for Putting Positive Psychology into Practice are: continuing to practice an Attitude of Gratitude, continuing to leverage my Signature Strengths, increase my awareness of my Thinking Traps, and work on being a Joy Multiplier!
Picture Credit: Pixabay