Journal Writings

One of the tools I started using early in my retirement was morning journaling. It was a tool I learned about in The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron While mine is not quite the 3-5 pages of handwritten stream of consciousness she recommends, it is something that I have continued almost every day in my retirement! Over time, my morning writing has become a morning gratitude, a bit of self-congratulation on getting something done, or a download of feelings to help me process them. These days I will often add in something I’ve heard or read and my reaction to it. Today’s post is some of those morning comments.

How do the days, weeks, months pass by and I feel like I have nothing to show for it? Isn’t this a great example of feelings versus reality! The feeling that is created by still not being back in the space we call our own. Yet, the reality is the mental load checklist of 60+ items now has 30 items checked off. And more will get checked off this week as interior painting starts (color finally on the white prepped walls) and granite is installed
“The challenges you never asked for, the patterns you’ve carried for years.” I just loved these words I read as it reflects how this past 2 years has been. Therapy for the trauma of the hurricane (that challenge never asked for) opened up my eyes to patterns I’ve had for years and ones I am continuing to work on changing.
“You cannot control others (faulty) perception of you, so don’t even try.” This hit me hard the other day when I was reminded that my opinion of blogging was discounted, even though I have been blogging for years (although not monetized). That my design capability was discounted by the same individual. And my writing capability discounted by someone else I know in my own heart that I’m a good blogger, a good designer, and a decent writer. Hey, I’m a published author. (Gratuitous self-promotion – see link to my book here on Amazon.)
And when I was left out on a critical board communication, I had to stop myself from the negative spiral on that one. Which prompted relooking at this note in my morning journal: Choose peace over pointless reaction. Stop reacting to disrespect, stop explaining yourself to others, stop giving emotional access to people who don’t deserve it. And I did receive an apology for that missed communication; not from the person who left me out, but by someone who said, “I should have noticed you were left out,” someone on the team who does respect me!
A comment made at a dinner this week, “I’m a creator, not a maintainer” made me journal, which am I? (AI to the rescue). Creators thrive on designing new systems, starting projects, and resolving undefined problems. Maintainers excel at optimizing existing processes, mitigating risks, creating order, and keeping things/organizations running smoothly day by day. Maintainers focus on stability, reliability and consistency. Creators thrive in start-ups, high risk situations, and chaos. It’s so clear which I am! (Maintainer if you’re new to my blog.)

So, there’s some insight into my morning journaling where it’s me talking to myself. This week’s journaling also had my end of the month “I Did it List” with its litany of club activities, friend’s connections, and house items. (A big reality check on point number one above!) My favorite non-regular things I did this month were going to see the musical Come From Away on Sept 11^th (with dinner pre-show) and joining a Ray’s fan friend at a ballgame (with great seats, thanks J!).

I also created my quarterly plan (OND) with the focus of getting back into our home and starting as I mean to go on – sunset porch sitting, weekly beach walks, create a local “go to place,” and plan one new thing a quarter. And all the restarts – a monthly intentional connection plan, monthly dinner date, my crafting time & gardening time, cooking, and regular biking. It made me realize how much normal living of my retirement lifestyle I have stopped doing these past 2 years.

Are you a journal keeper? A creator or a maintainer? Have a favorite quote to share from the past week?

P.S. House update for those following along – Pavers are in for courtyard and backyard patio (header photo of courtyard); side & back yard irrigation fixed (literally 10 breaks in the lines from demo work); templates done for granite countertops; window, door, & baseboard trimming done; and electric all done (except for faceplates). Issues this week – one of the granite pieces has a crack he’ll try and work around; we changed the kitchen backsplash tile area and needed more but it was sold out at one store & had just enough at another store (whew). We also had a rethink on gutters (cost), picked epoxy floor company (after 5 quotes received), and bought some of the items for the bathrooms ourselves (to keep forward momentum going.) Hoping for some colorful photos next week!