I still read a number of articles about retirement and retirement transition. I’m not 100% sure why – yes, it’s the name of my blog, but I’m going on 10 years retired now and 9 years writing a retirement transition blog! I’ve said retirement, like life, is full of transitions. But recently I wondered, how do I regard retirement now?
- I have finally come to accept saying, “I’m retired.” I’m not sure if it’s because I am now old enough for it to be quite acceptable (being retired at 53 is odd, being retired at 63 is fine) or living in a community with many other retirees. Or maybe it is because the perception of retirees has shifted. I look around at all the retirees in my various communities and there are so many who are active and living each day to its fullest, in their own ways.
- Retirement has given me time to explore new things, to learn to slow down, to learn how to play, to go deeper into understanding myself, and to work on personal development. I’ve explored spirituality & religion, well-being & happiness, chakras, Tarot, Enneagram, meditation, use of affirmations, positive psychology, gratitude, childhood trauma triggers, self-limiting beliefs, archetypes, and grief. I’ve played with vision statements, vision boards, word of the year, seasonal action plans. And I’ve blogged about a number of these topics! I’m a work in progress but I have definitely shifted away from being a pessimistic, cynical workaholic with limited hobbies!
- The loss of the comradery I had in a working environment has never really been replaced. I moved through the allure of gig work to try and fill that comradery loss (and to get a sense of achievement). I’ve been intentional on making connections, leaned in on joining clubs in my areas of interest, and tried to be the designated planner of events. It’s been a long journey and now I am working on acceptance of the way it is. Perhaps I am not alone in this challenge for comradery/belonging as my top post the past year was: How can I feel a sense of belonging? (link here)
- I’ve had to work through feeling like a failure at retirement, where the “acceptable options” still seem to be travel, volunteer, spend time with grandkids, or get another job to fill your time. Even though I touted in my book (still available on Amazon – link here) designing the retirement that’s right for you, I have to continually release the feelings of not doing retirement right!
- Retirement is full of adjustments and the original plan might need to be reworked. There have been a number of major shifts in my life since retirement. I created and then dissolved my consulting LLC. I acquired and then let lapse my retirement life coach certification. I shifted from snow-bird to full time Floridian.I tried a number of different exercise approaches and most slid to the wayside; but I am loving my current cardio drumming, beach yoga, Zumba, and beach walk blend. My desire for finding the right volunteer/philanthropic work came into being organically. (blog link here) I wrote a book (not on my original retirement plan!) and I dealt with breast cancer (also not on any plan).
A few focus areas I established at the beginning of my retirement are still with me – active healthy living, intentional connections, and out & about experiences were in my retirement life vision from the beginning and still account for my daily/weekly lifestyle today. But I’ve become more creative – I enjoy dabbling in crafting, gardening, and writing.
Of the original 222 items on my Possibility List (first blog link on this topic here – Sept 2015!), I’ve done 100 of them. Of course, many items were things I thought I should do in retirement! So, I’m not setting my sights on completing them all. Afterall, it was about possibilities, not a check list! Interestingly, I recently tried Tai Chi, which was on my original Possibility List! As for my 110 Things to Do in St Petersburg list generated with the big move to Florida, I’ve still got 21 things to do on that list. And, all of those are things I do still want to do!
As I approach 10 years retired, hit 9 years of blogging about retirement, and pass the 3 years living in Florida, I’m happy to say I’ve settled into my retirement lifestyle – the one I envisioned, the one that is right for me. It took me time to appreciate being retired, but I now regard it as the best time of my life.
How do you regard retirement?
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I may be lucky? I fell easily and happily into retirement. I worked exhaustively (with weekends off the last 18y). So managing my life happened after 10-12h days till bedtime, and weekends just so I could return to work and do it all again.
My immediate goal statement: Do what I want, when I want, if I want.
I slept 9-11h/nightly for 6 weeks solid. NO SCHEDULE ALLOWED! If I need a packed calendar why not keep making $ from it was my thought. (Volunteer orgs want a schedule-sorry, you don’t get me then even though I would love to volunteer.)
Read, quilt, garden,/preserve harvest for winter), walk, hike, cook, simply BE. These are the to-do list I looked forward to and 5 years later…..YES! I travel as well, some w/hubster and some solo. Like Dorothy though, there’s no place like home.
I did require of myself, 5 months of no plans as a test-drive to be sure the time was right. As a OR RN, I could get a job in 2 seconds if I needed to go back. Heck, my role still hadn’t been filled!
Like you, I continue to read blogs on topics I think I “have down pat” to keep perspective I suppose. Retirement, Simple Living, Quilting are my topics.
Happy Retirement everyone! 🙂
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Just Wow on the no schedule. I really do not think I could do that! I’m working on 2-3 days a week like that and it’s hard for me. I’ve never been the spontaneous sort. Yeah, I even plan what to read and when to garden. Sigh. But I do like your “do what I want, if I want!” That I am better at!
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I’ve been retired since 2019 and it took a big adjustment! Bigger than I expected but these days I am finally becoming comfortable with it. I have my routine and am learning to enjoy my time. I enjoy doing crafts and trying to get healthy.😊
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Some people seem to fall into retirement easily. I was not one of those people. And that’s one of the reasons I started to blog, to find others who struggled a bit with it, who had bigger than expected adjustments, who had to learn new skills (like being okay with slowing down). I’m glad to hear your learning to enjoy your time… that I believe is what retirement really is all about – having the freedom and time to do things you enjoy!
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Hi Pat! I’ve been retired just a little over 2 years and although I’m enjoying it I haven’t quite settled in yet. I still plan to travel while I’m able to do so but the thought of the actual ‘getting there’ part causes me a lot of anxiety 🥴 We’ve never been to the Grand Canyon and that’s on my bucket list so I’m gonna make that happen in April 🤞 I also need to let go of the arbitrary definition of retirement and accept that my version of it is perfect for me!!
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Sharon, It took me a long time to settle into retirement, so don’t feel like you’re alone in this! I still struggle with the arbitrary defintion, which I don’t match up to at all! But my retirement matches the vision I created for the lifestyle I wanted, mostly. Your’s will match your vision… perfect for you.
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Congrats on hitting your sweet spot when it comes to retirement. Everyone adapts to new situations differently and your process has been one of adjustments. I find it enlightening. Thanks for sharing it here.
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Ally, I like that phrase, “process has been one of adjustments”. I had thought of it more as shifts and growth, but adjustment has a nice feel to the word.
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It’s three years since you’ve moved to Florida? Good lord, time flies! I always admire your very honest self-appraisals, which can only help a person in the long run. I’ve had periods of doubt about my/our own journey, but then events happen that reinforce the original decision to retire and move when we did. Here’s the best barometer about retirement that works for me, but unfortunately isn’t one I recommend for yourself: it’s wonderful not having to shave every day if I don’t want to! 😄 – Marty
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Marty, Love the “not have to shave if I don’t want to”! Hubby is not one to skip that often as he finds it a more uncomfortable feeling to not shave daily. But I get the idea…. not sure what the female equivalent is!
And yeah, 3 years – At times I still feel like a new-bee, but other times like we’ve been here for longer. I still say, “we’ve only been here 3 years”. I recall years ago, when I first moved to Ohio, it took me 6-7 years before I truly felt like I was an Ohioan.
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Hi Pat – I think I was born to be retired (I’m even thinking about writing a blog post with that title one day!) It took me a while to adjust – I too felt like I was “too young” at 57 and I felt pushed into it. Once I hit my 60’s, did a brief return to paid work, and had a few other changes in life happen, I found my sweet spot (which involves not comparing my version of retirement to the full-on version of some bloggers). I love my life and I wouldn’t swap it for anything – it is such a gift that I’m grateful for every day. I’m glad you’re finding your sweet spot too. 🙂
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Leanne, I heard the phrase “born to be retired” to the music “born to be wild”! I think it would make a great blog post, too.
It’s taken me quite a long time to come to terms with being retired but I’m very happy with where my life is these days.
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