Change of Plan

~ patwdoyle11

“The best-laid plans of mice and men”… and apparently, retirement transitioners.

When life puts detours on your path, being resilient and adjusting is part of a successful retirement. And I am hell-bent on having a successful retirement. So it’s time for adjusting my plan.

What is the latest detour in my path? I’ve received a diagnosis of breast cancer.

First let me shout – early detection!! Because of being conscientious in my screenings, my cancer is Stage 1. (Ladies – did you get your mammogram this year? Men – your prostate screening? Everyone who needs it – your colonoscopy?) So my prognosis is extremely positive… it’s just a matter of being strong through the treatment.

 

So what’s changed on the retirement life plan?   A bunch of half-made travel plans are cancelled. The plans for new holiday traditions and our open house timing (from the move) are going to the sidelines. Even my regular Fun with Friends planning is stopped.   I had just gotten to the mind-set of accepting that being the planner more-often-than-not was OK – it’s a gift I’m giving to the others in the activities.

But, plans have a way of going to the wayside when priorities shift to self-preservation.

What has not changed – continued focus on what is important and manageable during this time – self care (how to keep up with yoga and walking, eating right, and being kind to myself), reading & writing (maybe time on my book editing, finally!), and even some light entertaining using that new kitchen. I will plan some quiet evenings – good friends will understand if I’m not at 100%, or barely at 50% even!

And I will reach out to others if I need it.   So often others don’t know what to do, and at this point I don’t know what to ask for.   But when I need help, I will not be too strong and independent and stubborn to ask!

I’m gonna be fine…it’s just a minor detour. I’m trying to stay with the positive attitude many of you have helped me learn to have in the past couple of years!   And if I’m not as active (commenting, writing) in the blog-o-sphere for a couple of months, you all will understand.

Published by patwdoyle11

Life is a series of transitions and my blog captures my retirement transition journey.

33 thoughts on “Change of Plan”

  2. Obviously I’m really behind in reading blog posts and just catching up with this one now.

    Sending you positive thoughts and energy for the days and weeks ahead. I’m a hugger, so I’m sending you as many virtual hugs as you may need or want!

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  6. Wow, Pat – that’s an enormous event. Do whatever you have to do, and feel whatever you have to feel. There are no rights or wrongs here. Best wishes for the speediest recovery possible under the circumstances.

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    1. Thanks. And thanks for the no right or wrongs. I got a bit of “feedback” yesterday in the “i never would have made it so public”. Ah well. To each his/her own. And it’s the many messages here, like yours, that I will refer back to when the bad days occur in the next couple of months.

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  7. Oh, Pat, I’m sorry that you have to take this detour! Good vibes and a virtual hug are being sent your way! That said, I am thrilled that you caught this early. My sister is a 25 year+ survivor! You’ve got this! It sounds like you’re doing everything right. Be kind to yourself and take care of you!!! The rest of your blogging friends have got your back! ~ Lynn

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    1. Thanks Lynn. I had a friend ask me yesterday why I made this so public. It’s knowing that friends, IRL and virtual, do have my back is why! And I’ve also had 2 friends schedule their mammograms becasue of this… both were fine, and I hope they continue the regular checks. I know for sure that my early detection will make this whole thing easier. Still not easy, but easier! Happy Holidays!

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  8. I don’t “like” this but wanted to acknowledge this. I’ve had my mammo too and thank goodness yours was detected very early. I’ve had many friends with early BC detection sail through treatment with the support of friends and family. Your positive attitude and how you spend your time healing will take you to cancer-free soon! My love and prayers to you Pat!

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    1. Thanks Terri. Yeah, it’s not a “like” topic… but I needed folks to be aware I might be less present – posting and commenting. I’m not sure where the healing journey will take me – right now I’m tired and sore and not able to have much movement…. so sitting on the couch looking at blog comments feels like the right thing. But creativity on a new blog topic, not so much. I’m just going to continue to take it one day at a time.

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  9. Thank you for sharing this news and I join all the others in commending your positive outlook. Beating cancer is as much a mental as a physical battle, but you are so fortunate to have found it early. Treatments are improving constantly, too, so stay strong and treat yourself gently and well. Keep us informed when it makes sense – I so enjoy your posts.

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    1. Peggy, Thanks for your reminding me about the mental battle. Hubby keeps reminding me that not only do I need to allow my body to heal but allow my emotions to not be suppressed. I tend to do that. For years I was either a half-glass empty cynic or an emotionless, get-the-job-done analytic. The past few years in retirement, I’ve been actively practicing positivity. It’s been kinda fascinating to face this challenge with those new positive outlook skills – I’m not sure the family knows how to handle this newer me!

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    1. Thanks. I guess if I had to choose a moment to have this challenge, it’s better when the weather is cold and gray which allows me to not miss being out and about and enjoy hunkering down on the couch all day! There are so many things to continue to be grateful for as I focus on coping and healing!

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  11. Oh man! I am so sorry to hear about your diagnosis, but kudos on being vigilant and getting to the diagnosis early! This should give you an excellent prognosis. Of course we will all understand if you have to be out of the game for some time.

    You make a good point about staying on top of things. I just had my annual prostate exam. 😳. It’s not fun, but it’s vital. I have even done some of my own blood testing via walkinlab.com because I want to keep better tabs on my health than is typically done via standard medical testing.

    Good luck and don’t be afraid to reach out if you need something!

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  13. Oh Pat, that truly sucks! Thank goodness you caught it early (and, yes, I have had my mammogram this year). I have a lot of friends who have had to go through this and are now doing well, but it isn’t fun while it’s happening. You have the love of your husband and friends (out here in blog-o-land too) and I’m glad to know that you feel comfortable reaching out. Sometimes you just need someone to vent to. Sending positive, healing thoughts to you.

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    1. Janis, It’s almost frightening how many women this has affected… everyone has a “my friend, my sister, my co-worker, me” story to tell. In fact, I discovered that 4 of the 5 women in my foodie group are survivors (I knew of 3, but not the 4th one as well). And almost all the stories are “just get through the treatment” and you’ll be fine. So that’s the new plan! Thanks for the positive healing thoughts.

      And I am thinking of you and the CA fires and praying the winds don’t bring them any closer to you. Positive thoughts back you to be safe.

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  14. Hi, Pat – I join all others in sending positive thoughts your way. Please reach out to us whenever you need. We are all here for you.

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      1. Hi, Pat – That is a good decision, and totally understandable. I’ll be thinking of you and will continue to send warm wishes your way.

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  16. Pat, Sending tons of positive energy and light your way. You will come out on the other side of this thing wiser, stronger, even more focused on what matters to you. I’m very sorry that it has happened, but you’re right – a minor detour.

    I know you’ll be smart enough to lean on the people in your immediate circle. I’m also sure that I speak for more than just myself when I say that I hope you will also lean on your blogging friends. We care about you.

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    1. Karen, I debated even putting it out there in the blog but I knew more positive thoughts are better and I could lean on my blogging friends as well. I think the blogging might keep me going as I’m less able to be mobile…. any sudden movement at the moment hurts. Fast stops in the car, hitting potholes, walking too long…. so sitting quietly seems to be the activity for the week!

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